Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Giving in Mom's Name



There was an American Red Cross blood drive today at my son Kevin's school
today and I went to donate.

I have been a blood donor since I was 17.    This donation was meaningful for me.

When Mom Margaret fell back in January, she was given 3 units of plasma. 

Even though technically, I was not donating for Mom, I was in my mind
donating in her memory. 

I was checked in and then led to the donation area.   I slid up on the table
and the nurse said.......

Hi my name is Margaret. !!!!!!!



I miss you so much Mom, but it's these little "God Winks" that keep reminding me that you're not that far away. 

Love ya Ma !!!




IMAG0115




Promise Yourself

 

Promise yourself .........

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.      

To talk health, happiness   
and prosperity                  
to every person you meet.          

To make all your friends                    
feel that there is something in them.             

To look at the sunny side of everything                     
and make your optimism come true.                                

To think only of the best, to work only for the best                
and expect only the best.                                   

To be enthusiastic about the success of others                     
as you are about your own.                                           

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to   
greater achievements of the future.                   

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times       
and give every living creature you meet a smile. 

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself 
that you have no time to criticize others.              

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger,   
too strong for fear and too happy                     
to permit the presence of trouble.                                

 

Christian D Larson
"Your Forces and How to Use Them" 1912

Your Forces and How to Use Them -(online complete text)

http://www.sacred-texts.com/nth/yfhu/index.htm



 



Sunday, March 28, 2010

Angels Around Us



My Dad passed back in November of last year.   My ex husband Mark asked me what he

could do for my Mom.    Mark, his wife Pam and I have quite the unusual relationship
considering he's my ex and she's his current wife.  

I said to Mark... why don't you send Mom an angel.   That would be a nice remembrance.
Mark and Pam picked out an angel and decided they would get together with Mom
and bring the angel over personally.    The holidays got in the way,
and then everything happened with Mom in early January.  (Her fall and brain injury)

After Mom's passing, Mark phoned me and said.......
"We have the angel, what should we do with it" ?    Instantly and without
hesitation I asked him to give it to our daughter Nicole.

After Mom's viewing - wake on the night of February 25th, we came home
to find a package by our front door.

The package was from a dear military Mom friend, Melanie.    I 'met' Melanie
online a few weeks before the 1st anniversary of her Marine son LCPL Lance M. Thompson's passing.    Lance was KIA in Iraq on November 15, 2004.

In November of 2005, I was putting together a condolence book for the
family of Fallen Marine LCPL Daniel M. McVicker.     Danny was from Ohio and I knew
that I could personally deliver the condolence book.   I was collecting email
messages to include in Danny's book.   Danny was KIA in Iraq on October 6, 2005.

Melanie sent me the most beautiful message.   I came to the bottom and
it was there I learned she was a Gold Star Mom.   Her note listed the date
of her son Lance's passing.

I saw that it was just almost 2 weeks until the 1st anniversary of his death.
The day stuck with me, as November 15th is my hubby Michael and my
wedding anniversary.

I had some poems that I thought I would like to email back to Melanie.
Something stopped me....   I was fearful that I might upset her.

Then out of the BLUE.... in a booming sort of voice to my thought.....

'Should I send these' ?      I heard .........  "YES - YES - YES".

Never before had something come to me so plainly. !!!!!!    I really did not have
a clue, at that time, that it was LANCE communicating to me. 
Later on I realized it.   :)))

Melanie emailed me back rather quickly asking......'Who are you, and
how do I know you' ????      I responded that we were on the same Marine
Family Condolence group, and that she had sent me messages for a book
I was putting together.
Mel told me that the messages were such a gift to her.    She was
contemplating a weekend trip that she was not looking forward to,
and the messages uplifted her ~Spirit~.     JUST as LANCE KNEW IT WOULD !!!!!

Melanie had sent me a gorgeous memorial bell after my Dad passed.
I knew the package was not heavy enough to be a similar bell. 

I opened it up to find this amazing angel.....








Angel-111 




I phoned Melanie to thank her.   She had no clue at all that my Mom
LOVED birds.     In talking to Mel she said that she was at a store and
had purchased something different.    After it was all paid for she asked
the clerk to please credit her the purchase, because she changed her
mind.    She proceeded to tell me that she was drawn to this angel.
The clerk came out with it and said....'You are lucky, it's our last one'. !!!!

I phone my daughter Nicole to tell her all about the angel and how
Melanie followed her intuition in returning the first item and picking
out this angel.

After Mom's funeral the next day, we gathered at their church for
a luncheon.    All the immediate family was going to gather at Mom and Dad's
house for the afternoon.    Michael and I had to run home to let the dog out.
I happened to glance and see Nicole's Dad hand her a gift bag. 
Since her birthday had just passed, I thought it must have been a
birthday gift. 

Michael and I went home, let Drake out and we were about to leave our
house to head back to Mom and Dad's.    At the last minute, I thought I would
take the Angel to show everyone.   I had the box on the table and I went to
pick up the angel.    Michael saw me do this as he was attempting to HURRY
me out the door.    I reached up and had my hand around the base of the
angel.......    Just then I heard a voice.....









"You don't have to bring that."     



It was not big and booming but it was very direct.    I pulled my hand
back and said to Michael.     "Ohhh I changed my mind".
I did not question the message....  I just thought okay, another time.

When we arrived at Mom's house, Nicole met me in the garage.
She said........... OMG --- you have to come in here and see something. !!!!

As soon as I saw the square Styrofoam packing, I knew INSTANTLY,
that her Dad and Pam had picked out the very same angel that Melanie
had sent me.



AND.... for all that I thought I was okay with my ex Mark....
at first I kept thinking.......   WHY MARK ??????
Why him to have this special moment. 

Then it came to me...  LET IT GO !!!   It's ALL GOOD !!!
It's been over 15 years since my divorce,
I needed that moment to have full closure.

I related the story to Mark.    I think it helped him with his upset
at himself for not getting the angel to Mom sooner. 

THANKS Melanie, Mark and Pam.   

With Love Always,
Deb

"NO DOUBT" .... 'the universe is unfolding as it should.'   

Desiderata - Max Ehrmann










Marine Corporal Lance M. Thompson




Marine Lance Corporal Daniel M. McVicker

Sunday, March 14, 2010

After Mom's Passing - An Encounter at the Same Store


Mom passed February 20, 2010.   She was 77 years old.   Three and a half months after Dad died.  So many folks said to me.........   It happens like that, one goes and then the other goes quickly.  
Let me be VERY clear on this, Mom had no intention of joining Dad this quickly.   She purchased a brand new car in early January.   She had a bus trip booked with some of her bingo lady friends to a casino for sometime here in March.    She was grieving Dad's passing in her own way, but she also felt a new found freedom being a widow.  She had even ordered some new furniture for her living room.

The hardest part about Mom's passing was that the day she fell back in
January, she was at
the VA taking care of the last of Dad's paper work from
his death.   The sidewalk was clear, no ice or snow, but it was raised and
she caught her foot on a crack.   The law in Ohio is such that a
raised sidewalk has to be I believe the lawyer said 3 inches before you have
any case.  
Her fall caused a brain injury and then in Feb she had 2 brain
surgeries.    She was home for a little over 24 hours and she had a cardiac
event.   Then it was 3 days later we removed her from the life support when
we knew the extent of her brain damage.

Mom was buried on February 26th.     On Monday March 1st I called my friend Tanya and said.......                  
'I need some Tanya time, are you available' ?     She was and said ....  'What do you want to do' ?

I said.....  'I'm not sure, I'll just be by to pick you up at such and such a time'. 

On the drive to Tanya's I had an ..... URGE to go to that same religious store that I had visited after Dad's passing in November.
Let me give you just a little background before I get on to the story. 
Tanya is my close dear friend who I have known for well over 11 years.   We met when she started watching our youngest Kevin.    Tanya's oldest granddaughter Abbey is coming on 5 years old next month.  
Ever since I was a very small child our parents took us to a Catholic Shrine in Carey Ohio.   The shrine is called ....   Our Lady of Consolation.    My last visit there was in the summer of 2008 when I took Mom and Dad there.    Google Maps says it's 128 miles from my house, but just to give you an idea that it's not a place that is in our neighborhood.   :)

So after I picked up Tanya, I said....  I would really like to stop at this store and it's not all that far from your place here. 

We pulled up to the store and parked.   As we started towards the door, we could see a very tiny black dog inside waiting at the door to greet us.    I said.... OMG, look it's a tiny dog.
We walked in the door and just to our left was the owner Patrick.    He was sitting at a table
and he appeared to be doing some sort of paper work.     The dog followed us over to Patrick and I said to him..... 'OMG, I have never seen this little dog here before'.    I guess I asked him where did you get him.   

Patrick proceeded to say..........'She came from Carey Ohio'.    I stopped him and said....
'The Shrine there in Carey" ?     He said yes.    'I have a friend there named 'DEB'.
She had bought the dog as a gift for her friend Tanya.     Tanya did not realize exactly how much work a tiny puppy was going to be.    With her work schedule it was just too much to keep the little dog.    Patrick proceeded to say that he and his wife adopted her from Tanya, over 2 years ago.    Patrick said that Tanya's young daughter was SO VERY upset at having to lose the dog, they decided to name the puppy after the daughter.....  'Her name is Abbey'.  

WOW........... WOW.......................   All the connections were just WAY too much to be some sort of a coincidence.      I explained to Patrick how very special the shrine at Carey was to my family.     We told him of the name connections.    He said he was definitely going to related the story to DEB, the next time he visited there.  
AND.............. the morning I headed out with Tanya, I had a NUDGE to grab my camera and take it with me.    Now, I do frequently take my camera, but it's not like I grab it every time I walk out my door. 

Here is a photo of Tanya and Abbey from that morning:


Img_5278-1


Sometime after our visit there on March 1st.     I came across this photo of my Dad, my older bro David and myself.    It was taken in September of 1959.     David was almost 3 and I would have been about 18 months old.    Dad would have been 29.   Obviously Mom was taking the photo.
Our youngest bro, Mike was born in June of 1960.   
HE MIGHT have been there too depending on the exact time of conception.   LOL


Our Lady of Consolation Shrine - LINK


My bro David was hugging me THEN.... As he has been now after Mom's death.  ;)
IMG555 


For me.............   Just a few more of the GOD WINKS from the other side.

So VERY comforting indeed. 



They Do Speak, Just Be Open to Listen


Dad passed November 5, 2009.    Up until the Spring of last year, at 78 years old, Dad had been working as a WalMart greeter.   A position he held for 14 years since his retirement from grocery store retail management. He worked approximately 35-38 hours a week.    In April Dad had some ischemic strokes, other wise referred to as mini strokes.    He was hospitalized, but released.    He was doing out patient therapy.   He was not majorly impaired from the strokes.    In July he fell and broke 5 ribs.    He never returned home after that fall.The day after Dad's burial on November 11th, I just felt the need to go to the cemetery.    I don't particularly have an attachment to cemeteries, as I feel the soul-spirit does not reside there, still something drew me to plan to go there that day.    My drive to the cemetery is under 20 minutes.   On the way there, I had intended to stop at a local religious store.    The morning had gotten away from me and time was running short for Kevin to be home from school.    I knew he had not taken his house key that morning, so I had  a specific time to be home.    As I back out of my drive, I decided to nix the religious store and just go on to his grave site.While driving down the street where I would pass by the religious store I had a BOOMING message.....

'YOU NEED TO STOP THERE' !!!!!!!

Not being one to ignore biggie messages like that, I figured ... OKAY, I better stop.   :)
I walked into the store intending to walk back to the area where some pocket coins are kept.   As soon as I walked in the door, from my peripheral vision on my right side, I saw a woman at the cashier's desk.    I did not actually turn to view her, but instantly I heard her voice and then stopped.     As I stopped to look her way, she also looked towards me.    It was Lynn, a RN who had taken care of Dad at a local hospital during one of his many stays that past year.    Lynn was no ordinary RN.   She really bonded with Dad.    Even so much as coming to the nursing home to visit him there.    In the last few weeks of Dad's life, the frustration of his bodily limitations had taken a great toll on him.    He was not really up for some visitors.   Lynn had sensed that on her last trip to see Dad, and she had decided it was best not to drop in on him.   
Still, Mom had kept in touch with her by phone.    After Dad's passing we had not gotten Lynn notified.    She walked up to me with a huge smile and arms extended for a hug.  

She then said........  'How's your Dad doing' ?     I informed her that we had just buried him the day before.
   She was visibly shaken and upset to tears at the news.   Lynn and Dad had shared their faith with one another, and after his months of suffering, I explained we were at peace with his passing.      

These pocket coins that I was there to pick up that day are ones that I keep giving away to folks I meet who seem to be in need of something to uplift them. 

I knew exactly WHY I was led to the store that day.     The timing is out of this world.  


The key is listening and acting on the messages that come to you.   :)


NOW.......... I have a story about the same religious store after Mom passed in February.  
I'm going to make a second post about that one.