June Ohio Sunrise

Ohio Sunrise ~ 5:39 A.M.

 

Ohio Sunrise ~ 5:54 A.M.

 

~ Sliver of Moon ~

 

~ Zoomed in  Sliver of Moon ~

Sending Love and Light

Some of you reading this post do know Hallie and family personally.   If you are like me, you 'know' Hallie and her family through the World Wide Web. 

I first 'met' Hallie back in 2007 when she joined the Air Force Parents online support group.
  Others reading this have come to know her through her blog, The Wonderful World of Wieners.

Back in 2007 Hallie shared with the AF group that she 'started her blog before CJ left to keep him updated on us and everyone else updated on him'.

Certainly that she did !!  Her open sharing of her family life with John, CJ, Connor, Danielle (CJ's fiancee) and the Wieners has endeared hundreds of followers.

On April 15th, with CJ's suicide, their world went dark.   Word started to spead that CJ had died.  On the AF support group, on Face Book.    It would be 3 weeks after that Hallie publicly stated on her Face Book page......        "The song was wrong, suicide is not painless".

Hallie has shared the raw and agonizing emotions of a Mothers loss of her son.   People who know her in person, and hundreds of online friends have been there with words of support.   Messages posted to her personal blog, messages shared on her Face Book page, messages posted on the Air Force group, private emails, candle sites, several memorial sites.

Speaking as an online friend, I would like to describe how CJ's passing has affected me.    My heart has felt like a huge hand went right through my chest and grabbed a hold of my heart.   I have pictured any of my children in the same place.   I know I am not alone with this gut wrenching helpless feeling.   

Every person who knows of CJ's death has felt it too.


Thursday night, I had a HUGE REVELATION.        I was watching TV, got up from the couch, grabbed a pen and paper and started to write . . . . . .



"We're draining Hallie"     -----    We need to empower her.   

The horror and dread is being re-lived and sent back to Hallie.   We are using our imagination to put ourselves in her place, and by doing so, instead of sending Hallie and family OUR LOVE AND GOOD ENERGY, we are unintentionally sending them our pain.

"What we need to do is find a positive affirmation that can be repeated by everyone when a thought of CJ, Hallie, John, Connor, Danielle and their family comes into our mind."

I located a blog post by Mark Anthony .....    The Circle of Light.

From the post...   The Circle of Light ~

A Circle of Light occurs when spiritual people gather together to pray and meditate to achieve a positive result. This is a means of raising your vibrational energy in harmony with like minded individuals in order to create a whole greater than the sum of the parts.....

From the beginning of time people have utilized the power of a Circle of Light. A Circle of Light occurs whenever people join to pray for peace, healing or devotional purposes. Hindus collectively chant the names of God. Buddhists meditate as a group. Catholics pray the rosary in unison. Christian prayer rings. Muslims praying together five times a day. All of these form a Circle of Light.

Every one of us who cares about Hallie and her family has the ability
to BE a..............


  * POINT OF HEALING LIGHT IN THIS CIRCLE *

PLEASE do grab this graphic.    Print it out and find some place you can
display it as a reminder.........   Share it on your blog, share it on Face Book. 

*  A very special THANK YOU to Mark Anthony for his permission to share his words. 

On Mother’s Day, Hallie, John and Connor, as a family, made the decision to participate in the “Out of the Darkness Overnight.” This
is a walk sponsored by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
that they learned about through Hallie’s brother, David. After hearing
about this walk, they made the decision to take this journey, together,
as a family. Over the course of the last week, with the Twomey family’s blessing, the team has grown to include some of Hallie and John’s family as well as some of their closest friends.
They are NEAR their team goal of $20,000. 

OUT OF THE DARKNESS

UPDATE - Tuesday May 11th.    

Hallie, John, Connor and Grandma Gayle have met their fund raising goal.  !!!!

Other teams members:    Uncle David Keene -   Aunt Shelly Kobrenski -  & Friend Kim Marcotte
STILL need financial support to meet their goals.   


LINK to TEAM CJ - OUT OF THE DARKNESS OVERNIGHT - WALK

~*~   CJ Twomey   ~*~

I 'met'  (online) Hallie back in the summer of 2007 through her WONDERFUL blog,

Wonderful World of Weiners

Hallie's 20 year old son C.J. took his own life in April.   
On May 5th on her Facebook page, Hallie posted this message:

'Three weeks ago today...three weeks.
The song was wrong. Suicide is NOT painless. Shmoops, I miss you.'

Yesterday, on Mother's Day - Hallie shared that their family, would be
participating in the American Foundation for Suicide Preventions, Boston
Out of The Darkness Walk. 

Since knowing of CJ's death, I have prayed for his Mother Hallie,
his Father John, and his little brother, Connor, his fiancee, Danielle
and everyone who has been affected by his passing. 

My distinct prayer for Hallie has been.... "Dear Lord, may Hallie find some
way to build a bridge over this gut wrenching pain".


THIS WALK .... OUT OF THE DARKNESS ... IS THAT BRIDGE !!!

They need to raise a certain monetary amount to participate.


I know many folks don't like to do the online donation, this is a link to
a PDF form.
Print it out and mail to the address listed.

You will need this info for the top of the form. USE only ONE name
and number per form.


Name of Participant    Hallie Twomey - Supporter ID - 10016565

Name of Participant    John Twomey - Supporter ID - 10016567

Name of Participant    Connor Twomey - Supporter ID - 10016572

EVENT ID -  #  603

Donation Form to Print and mail in - The Over Night



If you would care to donate directly online here is the link:

TEAM CJ Link to donate online

Christopher John Twomey

Christopher John Twomey, known to his loved ones as C.J.
passed away unexpectedly on April 15.


He was the beloved first born son of John and Hallie Twomey
arriving on July 3, 1989 in Stoneham, MA. Following his graduation from
Edward Little High School in 2007, C.J. spent time proudly serving as
an enlisted aircrew member in the United States Air Force, successfully
earning his enlisted aircrew wings.


C. J. was known as a friend to all, a natural comedian and the life
of the party. His smile brought joy to his friends and his family
alike. He was charismatic, extremely charming and always willing to
lend a hand to a friend in need. He loved unconditionally and made sure
those people he cared about always felt special. His zest for life and
his ability to see the good in all will never be forgotten.


He was and always will be the world’s greatest big brother to
Connor. Their relationship was something to behold. They adored one
another from day one and were the best of friends.


C. J. is survived by his loving parents, John and Hallie Twomey of
Auburn, his younger brother Connor of Auburn, his grandfather Bill
Keene of Haverhill, MA, his grandmother and husband, Gayle and Paul
Nigro of Haverhill, MA, his grandparents Mike and Jerri Twomey of
Hampton, NH, his uncle and aunt David Keene and Shelley Kobrenski and
their daughter Sarah of Acton, MA, his uncle Brian Twomey of Amesbury,
MA, his aunt Jennifer Twomey and her three children, Ethan, Gabby and
Matias of New York City, NY, and his loving fiancé Danielle Dubois of
Auburn. C.J. will also be missed by countless friends who loved him as
much as he loved them.

C.J. will be forever in our hearts.

.    .    .    .    .     .    .    .    .    .

With my unending prayers and LOVE to you all

XO XO

Deb

~ I am in the Light ~

~ I am in the Light ~

A shadow of joy flickered; it is me.
I told you I wouldn't leave.
My memories, my thoughts are imbedded deep in your heart.
I still love you.
Do not for one moment think that you have been abandoned.
I am in the Light.
In the corner, in the hall, the car, the yard ...
these are the places I stay with you.
My spirit rises every time you pray for me,
but my energy comes closer to you.
Love does not diminish; it grows stronger.
I am the feather that finds you in the yard,
the dimmed light that grows brighter in your mind,
I place our memories for you to see.
We lived in our special way,
a way that now has its focus changed.
I still crave your understanding
and long for the many words of prayer
and good fortune for my soul.
I am in the Light.
As you struggle to adjust without me,
I watch silently.
Sometimes I summon up all the strength of my new world
to make you notice me.
Impressed by your grief,
I try to impress my love deeper into your consciousness.
As you should, I call out to the Heavens for help.
You should know that the fountain of youth does exist.
My soul is now healthy.
Your love sends me new found energy.
I am adjusting to this new world.
I am with you and I am in the Light.
Please don't feel bad that you can't see me.
I am with you wherever you go.
I protect you, just as you protected me so many times.
Talk to me and somehow I will find a way to answer you.
Mother, Father, son or daughter, it makes no difference.
Brother, sister, lover, husband or wife, it makes no difference.
Whatever our connection, friend or even foe ...
I see you with my new eyes.
I am learning to help wherever you are, wherever I am needed.
This can be done because I am in the Light.
When you feel despair, reach out to me ... I will come.
My love for you truly does transcend from Heaven to Earth.
Finish your life with the enthusiasm and zest that you had
when we were together in the physical sense.
You owe this to me, but more importantly,
you owe it to yourself.
Life continues for both of us.
I am with you because I love you
and I am in the Light.

~ Author Unknown ~

These beautiful words came to me first when shared by
my friend Gabrielle. 

In Loving memory of her son - Jeremy K. Lehmann 12-10-1982 ~ 8-18-2006

I'm sharing them in memory of another young man also gone from this earth
all too soon.

Hallie, John, Connor, Danielle and family..... 

In Loving memory of Christopher J. Twomey - 7-3-1989 ~ 4-15-2010

I'm editing my message from last May to include..... Max.  (1-13-2011)
Holding his family and friends in prayer.

In Loving memory of Maxwell Thomas Hyre - 6-24-1994 - 12-23-2010

 

 

(Photo - My Dad's Angel taken ~ May 1, 2010 ~ Dad would have been 80 today)

On Eagles' Wings

Mom passed on Saturday February 20, 2010.   On Monday February 22nd, I was
driving from my house to Mom's place.   My brother David was staying at Mom's.

On the back road to Mom's it is not unusual to encounter semi-trucks.   There is a
food storage warehouse, so semis are quite common.   
The weather was overcast and a light snow was falling.   I come upon a truck
that is just about crawling in front of me.
I started to mumble and bitch to myself about it, when I looked up as saw a bible
quotation on the back of the truck.    I knew I did not have time, nor the ability to
write down the whole verse, so I grabbed my cell phone and took this photo.

I explained to David what had just happened.   I said to David...   "It's pretty
RARE to see a bible verse on the back of a truck.   Whatever that verse was,
I need to find out.  I think it's going to be of some importance." 

Upon looking up the verse......

‘They that hope in the Lord will renew
their strengths, they will soar as with
eagles wings.   They will run and not
grow weary, walk and will not grow faint’.

Isaiah 40:31

I knew exactly how important.   Mom had been discharged from the hospital
on 2-17.   On the evening of 2-18, she collapsed.  (fainted)   She was revived,
but on 2-20 following her wishes, she was removed from life support.

It was Mom letting US know she was soaring with those eagles.  
For those of you who don't know....   MOM LOVED BIRDS !!!!!

My sister in law, Rose created the program for Mom's funeral mass.
The closing song of her funeral mass was....

On Eagles' Wings 


Dedicated today to Christopher J. Twomey as he is laid to rest.
May God be with your family and friends now, and for a long
time to come.   Comforted by an Army of Angels and friends.  
CJ Twomey - July 3, 1989 ~ April 15, 2010

 

Giving in Mom's Name

There was an American Red Cross blood drive today at my son Kevin's school
today and I went to donate.

I have been a blood donor since I was 17.    This donation was meaningful for me.

When Mom Margaret fell back in January, she was given 3 units of plasma. 

Even though technically, I was not donating for Mom, I was in my mind
donating in her memory. 

I was checked in and then led to the donation area.   I slid up on the table
and the nurse said.......

Hi my name is Margaret. !!!!!!!



I miss you so much Mom, but it's these little "God Winks" that keep reminding me that you're not that far away. 

Love ya Ma !!!

Promise Yourself

 

Promise yourself .........

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.      

To talk health, happiness   
and prosperity                  
to every person you meet.          

To make all your friends                    
feel that there is something in them.             

To look at the sunny side of everything                     
and make your optimism come true.                                

To think only of the best, to work only for the best                
and expect only the best.                                   

To be enthusiastic about the success of others                     
as you are about your own.                                           

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to   
greater achievements of the future.                   

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times       
and give every living creature you meet a smile. 

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself 
that you have no time to criticize others.              

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger,   
too strong for fear and too happy                     
to permit the presence of trouble.                                

 

Christian D Larson
"Your Forces and How to Use Them" 1912

Your Forces and How to Use Them -(online complete text)

http://www.sacred-texts.com/nth/yfhu/index.htm



 

Angels Around Us

My Dad passed back in November of last year.   My ex husband Mark asked me what he could do for my Mom.    Mark, his wife Pam and I have quite the unusual relationship considering he's my ex and she's his current wife.  

I said to Mark... why don't you send Mom an angel.   That would be a nice remembrance.
Mark and Pam picked out an angel and decided they would get together with Mom
and bring the angel over personally.    The holidays got in the way,
and then everything happened with Mom in early January.  (Her fall and brain injury)

After Mom's passing, Mark phoned me and said.......
"We have the angel, what should we do with it" ?    Instantly and without
hesitation I asked him to give it to our daughter Nicole.

After Mom's viewing - wake on the night of February 25th, we came home
to find a package by our front door.

The package was from a dear military Mom friend, Melanie.    I 'met' Melanie
online a few weeks before the 1st anniversary of her Marine son LCPL Lance M. Thompson's passing.    Lance was KIA in Iraq on November 15, 2004.

In November of 2005, I was putting together a condolence book for the
family of Fallen Marine LCPL Daniel M. McVicker.     Danny was from Ohio and I knew
that I could personally deliver the condolence book.   I was collecting email
messages to include in Danny's book.   Danny was KIA in Iraq on October 6, 2005.

Melanie sent me the most beautiful message.   I came to the bottom and
it was there I learned she was a Gold Star Mom.   Her note listed the date
of her son Lance's passing.

I saw that it was just almost 2 weeks until the 1st anniversary of his death.
The day stuck with me, as November 15th is my hubby Michael and my
wedding anniversary.

I had some poems that I thought I would like to email back to Melanie.
Something stopped me....   I was fearful that I might upset her.

Then out of the BLUE.... in a booming sort of voice to my thought.....

'Should I send these' ?      I heard .........  "YES - YES - YES".

Never before had something come to me so plainly. !!!!!!    I really did not have
a clue, at that time, that it was LANCE communicating to me. 
Later on I realized it.   :)))

Melanie emailed me back rather quickly asking......'Who are you, and
how do I know you' ????      I responded that we were on the same Marine
Family Condolence group, and that she had sent me messages for a book
I was putting together.
Mel told me that the messages were such a gift to her.    She was
contemplating a weekend trip that she was not looking forward to,
and the messages uplifted her ~Spirit~.     
JUST as LANCE KNEW IT WOULD !!!!!

Melanie had sent me a gorgeous memorial bell after my Dad passed.
I knew the package was not heavy enough to be a similar bell. 

I opened it up to find this amazing angel.....







 




I phoned Melanie to thank her.   She had no clue at all that my Mom
LOVED birds.     In talking to Mel she said that she was at a store and
had purchased something different.    After it was all paid for she asked
the clerk to please credit her the purchase, because she changed her
mind.    She proceeded to tell me that she was drawn to this angel.
The clerk came out with it and said....'You are lucky, it's our last one'. !!!!

I phone my daughter Nicole to tell her all about the angel and how
Melanie followed her intuition in returning the first item and picking
out this angel.

After Mom's funeral the next day, we gathered at their church for
a luncheon.    All the immediate family was going to gather at Mom and Dad's
house for the afternoon.    Michael and I had to run home to let the dog out.
I happened to glance and see Nicole's Dad hand her a gift bag. 
Since her birthday had just passed, I thought it must have been a
birthday gift. 

Michael and I went home, let Drake out and we were about to leave our
house to head back to Mom and Dad's.    At the last minute, I thought I would
take the Angel to show everyone.   I had the box on the table and I went to
pick up the angel.    Michael saw me do this as he was attempting to HURRY
me out the door.    I reached up and had my hand around the base of the
angel.......    Just then I heard a voice.....








"You don't have to bring that."     


It was not big and booming but it was very direct.    I pulled my hand
back and said to Michael.     "Ohhh I changed my mind".
I did not question the message....  I just thought okay, another time.

When we arrived at Mom's house, Nicole met me in the garage.
She said........... OMG --- you have to come in here and see something. !!!!

As soon as I saw the square Styrofoam packing, I knew INSTANTLY,
that her Dad and Pam had picked out the very same angel that Melanie
had sent me.



AND.... for all that I thought I was okay with my ex Mark....
at first I kept thinking.......   WHY MARK ??????
Why him to have this special moment. 

Then it came to me...  LET IT GO !!!   It's ALL GOOD !!!
It's been over 15 years since my divorce,
I needed that moment to have full closure.

I related the story to Mark.    I think it helped him with his upset
at himself for not getting the angel to Mom sooner. 

THANKS Melanie, Mark and Pam.   

With Love Always,
Deb

"NO DOUBT" .... 'the universe is unfolding as it should.'   
Desiderata - Max Ehrmann









Marine Corporal Lance M. Thompson




Marine Lance Corporal Daniel M. McVicker

After Mom's Passing - An Encounter at the Same Store

Mom passed February 20, 2010.   She was 77 years old.   Three and a half months after Dad died.  So many folks said to me.........   It happens like that, one goes and then the other goes quickly.  
Let me be VERY clear on this, Mom had no intention of joining Dad this quickly.   She purchased a brand new car in early January.   She had a bus trip booked with some of her bingo lady friends to a casino for sometime here in March.    She was grieving Dad's passing in her own way, but she also felt a new found freedom being a widow.  She had even ordered some new furniture for her living room.

The hardest part about Mom's passing was that the day she fell back in
January, she was at
the VA taking care of the last of Dad's paper work from
his death.   The sidewalk was clear, no ice or snow, but it was raised and
she caught her foot on a crack.   The law in Ohio is such that a
raised sidewalk has to be I believe the lawyer said 3 inches before you have
any case.  
Her fall caused a brain injury and then in Feb she had 2 brain
surgeries.    She was home for a little over 24 hours and she had a cardiac
event.   Then it was 3 days later we removed her from the life support when
we knew the extent of her brain damage.

Mom was buried on February 26th.     On Monday March 1st I called my friend Tanya and said.......                  
'I need some Tanya time, are you available' ?     She was and said ....  'What do you want to do' ?

I said.....  'I'm not sure, I'll just be by to pick you up at such and such a time'. 

On the drive to Tanya's I had an ..... URGE to go to that same religious store that I had visited after Dad's passing in November.
Let me give you just a little background before I get on to the story. 
Tanya is my close dear friend who I have known for well over 11 years.   We met when she started watching our youngest Kevin.    Tanya's oldest granddaughter Abbey is coming on 5 years old next month.  
Ever since I was a very small child our parents took us to a Catholic Shrine in Carey Ohio.   The shrine is called ....   Our Lady of Consolation.    My last visit there was in the summer of 2008 when I took Mom and Dad there.    Google Maps says it's 128 miles from my house, but just to give you an idea that it's not a place that is in our neighborhood.   :)

So after I picked up Tanya, I said....  I would really like to stop at this store and it's not all that far from your place here. 

We pulled up to the store and parked.   As we started towards the door, we could see a very tiny black dog inside waiting at the door to greet us.    I said.... OMG, look it's a tiny dog.We walked in the door and just to our left was the owner Patrick.    He was sitting at a table
and he appeared to be doing some sort of paper work.     The dog followed us over to Patrick and I said to him..... 'OMG, I have never seen this little dog here before'.    I guess I asked him where did you get him.   

Patrick proceeded to say..........'She came from Carey Ohio'.    I stopped him and said....'The Shrine there in Carey" ?     He said yes.    'I have a friend there named 'DEB'.
She had bought the dog as a gift for her friend Tanya.     Tanya did not realize exactly how much work a tiny puppy was going to be.    With her work schedule it was just too much to keep the little dog.    Patrick proceeded to say that he and his wife adopted her from Tanya, over 2 years ago.    Patrick said that Tanya's young daughter was SO VERY upset at having to lose the dog, they decided to name the puppy after the daughter.....  'Her name is Abbey'.  

WOW........... WOW.......................   All the connections were just WAY too much to be some sort of a coincidence.      I explained to Patrick how very special the shrine at Carey was to my family.     We told him of the name connections.    He said he was definitely going to related the story to DEB, the next time he visited there.  AND.............. the morning I headed out with Tanya, I had a NUDGE to grab my camera and take it with me.    Now, I do frequently take my camera, but it's not like I grab it every time I walk out my door. 

Here is a photo of Tanya and Abbey from that morning:

Sometime after our visit there on March 1st.     I came across this photo of my Dad, my older bro David and myself.    It was taken in September of 1959.     David was almost 3 and I would have been about 18 months old.    Dad would have been 29.   Obviously Mom was taking the photo.
Our youngest bro, Mike was born in June of 1960.   
HE MIGHT have been there too depending on the exact time of conception.   LOL

Our Lady of Consolation Shrine - LINK


My bro David was hugging me THEN.... As he has been now after Mom's death.  ;)
 

For me.............   Just a few more of the GOD WINKS from the other side.

So VERY comforting indeed. 

They Do Speak, Just Be Open to Listen

Dad passed November 5, 2009.    Up until the Spring of last year, at 78 years old, Dad had been working as a WalMart greeter.   A position he held for 14 years since his retirement from grocery store retail management. He worked approximately 35-38 hours a week.    In April Dad had some ischemic strokes, other wise referred to as mini strokes.    He was hospitalized, but released.    He was doing out patient therapy.   He was not majorly impaired from the strokes.    In July he fell and broke 5 ribs.    He never returned home after that fall.The day after Dad's burial on November 11th, I just felt the need to go to the cemetery.    I don't particularly have an attachment to cemeteries, as I feel the soul-spirit does not reside there, still something drew me to plan to go there that day.    My drive to the cemetery is under 20 minutes.   On the way there, I had intended to stop at a local religious store.    The morning had gotten away from me and time was running short for Kevin to be home from school.    I knew he had not taken his house key that morning, so I had  a specific time to be home.    As I back out of my drive, I decided to nix the religious store and just go on to his grave site.While driving down the street where I would pass by the religious store I had a BOOMING message.....

'YOU NEED TO STOP THERE' !!!!!!!

Not being one to ignore biggie messages like that, I figured ... OKAY, I better stop.   :)I walked into the store intending to walk back to the area where some pocket coins are kept.   As soon as I walked in the door, from my peripheral vision on my right side, I saw a woman at the cashier's desk.    I did not actually turn to view her, but instantly I heard her voice and then stopped.     As I stopped to look her way, she also looked towards me.    It was Lynn, a RN who had taken care of Dad at a local hospital during one of his many stays that past year.    Lynn was no ordinary RN.   She really bonded with Dad.    Even so much as coming to the nursing home to visit him there.    In the last few weeks of Dad's life, the frustration of his bodily limitations had taken a great toll on him.    He was not really up for some visitors.   Lynn had sensed that on her last trip to see Dad, and she had decided it was best not to drop in on him.   
Still, Mom had kept in touch with her by phone.    After Dad's passing we had not gotten Lynn notified.    She walked up to me with a huge smile and arms extended for a hug.  

She then said........  'How's your Dad doing' ?     I informed her that we had just buried him the day before.   She was visibly shaken and upset to tears at the news.   Lynn and Dad had shared their faith with one another, and after his months of suffering, I explained we were at peace with his passing.      

These pocket coins that I was there to pick up that day are ones that I keep giving away to folks I meet who seem to be in need of something to uplift them. 

I knew exactly WHY I was led to the store that day.     The timing is out of this world.  

The key is listening and acting on the messages that come to you.   :)

NOW.......... I have a story about the same religious store after Mom passed in February.  
I'm going to make a second post about that one.